Crazy Crush!

I and a friend went for a meal  after  an  exam today, it was a nice break from all the stress of studying and anxiety lol. We got talking and ended up on  topic of relationships, currently my friend is in a relationship and they are so perfect together, she found a really nice gentleman. Lol .. I say gentleman when they are really nice. We discussed our past crazy crushes which was funny and also observed how people rush into things when they are not ready. I have not been in a relationship yet and I don't want to because the me right now at this moment is definitely not ready lol. But one thing I've noticed about my previous crushes is how intense they were.I indirectly hinted this to my friend lol. When you crush on someone you are so blinded by the false image you have of them,  you can't even see the real person. That's what I found when  my crushes ended, it's not that my crush had changed but because I had cleared the rosy smog that blocked my view of who he really was I truly saw him for......wait for it who he really was!. What am I trying to say?  

From observations of myself I think people when they first like each other should take time to clear any rosy smog clouding their view of the person they admire. Of course not everyone is like me but i see this as a pointer to work on, you don't want any ugly surprises when you are in the middle of a relationship. That's why the statement "you've really changed", is sometimes invalid. Its not that they have changed, its beacuse you didn't take your time to really SEE .

 my conclusion - Honesty is Key , :D I love chats with friends they always get you to think.

And to be honest am also at an advantage because I believe that God will help me out the the time comes.

Being Humble..

I realised today that I have an Issue with pride, so today another drummer came to help out. To teach me the ropes, but it was the way it was done that annoyed me, also my quick conclusion thoughts fuelled my actions and probably left a bad first impression. sighs
 so I find that I am not playing the drums today but watching, I think I feel threatened sometimes because instruments in general are a male dominated area, so today when I went up to play the way I was first dismissed was unpleasant. it was like "Woman you just watch". the Bass player gave me that look, I was like seriously?? are you kidding me

i gave a really sarcastic answer to his question " are you playing today", I then said " well. obviously like I play every week". The drummer who was meant to help me improve was standing, so I didn't even look at him. I just stood up and walked away. . how rude of me

I didn't grasp the whole situation I just reacted, I should have been calmer and that's when I realised it was an issue with pride. The conga player had actually brought the drummer guy to help me improve not to put me down, I read the situation wrongly. And even if the way they talked to me was flippant I should have stuck to being the nice person I KNOW I am.
 At the end of the day I ended up nest to the drummer who was amazing by the way. I really learnt a lot from just watching him play.
This is where being Humble and Humility is important in life.
DON'T react, wait the situation out and be patient.

James 1:19 - "My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry."

Faithful in my Unfaithfulness

So to day was the day of yet another exam, i was really expecting the worst.Because I finished my revision this morning, I have to thank God. He must still have hope in me, I just feel like I don't do the things he likes. I wanna change, its one thing to talk and speak about him but to live a life pleasing to him is another story. I can do all things through Christ that Strengthens me. I will be aright :) I am going to be Positive!

He has shown me several times that he loves me, so what am I doing?

Positivity is Key

Today  my house mate called me down to have a chat, she started to make advise me saying that  I was being too negative about my life in several aspects and my  negativity was affecting her. I didn't realise this until she pointed it out, and it must be quite bad if its to the extent of affecting her? wow! after she spoke I thought about it... and she was right. so I started to come up with ways to be more positive. MY SOLUTION: The only way to win against negative thoughts is to not tolerate them. So therefore when they come in my mind i must counteract them with positivity :D
MY POSITIVITY IS
philipians 4:8

One Down 4 To Go!

Ok so my first exam is done, finito, behind me! As usual I was nervous and fidgety. The exam room itself was daunting but once I finally found my seat, I took a deep breath and made myself comfortable. Traditionally  there's always someone's alarm that goes off during the exam.. and this exam was no different lol



The paper was okay but my fate will be decided when I get my results. What you sew is what you reap. :D I'll Defo work harder for my next exams. Promise! lol

This is Crazy!!

Okay so earlier I said that I would make this blog more about God and it would generate more traffic than ever, so because I trusted in him in this little thing and advanced he actually came and did it for me. ARE YOU KIDDING! I had in the space of 10 minutes more views than I have had in a whole week… that’s crazy. No wonder the bible says that if you are faithful in the little things you will be faithful in the larger ones. Luke16:10
Lol so this means if I God to use me  change the world I have to start being faithful first in the small things in my life, like prayer and Sunday school e.tc. :D time to work on myself! Am excited!

And God Spoke...

This early morning I was praying and God said to me to make this blog more about him, he promised that I would generate more traffic than ever in my life and I trust that. It made sense, if I truly want to write a blog that changes lives and gives hope to people I should make it based on the one thing that has done that for me. Read my Blog with an open mind, this blog will be about my experiences with God. I am Christian, I believe in Christ and the Bible. I don’t try to twist the bible to the left or to the right; I take it as it is and pray about it and wait on God to speak to me. People may ask, how does he speak to you? There are so many avenues he may use, he can leave a deep impression in your heart, therefore whatever he is speaking to you about stays on your mind and you can’t shake it off. Or he may use others to speak to you, people you did not even expect.
God bless you all. :D I am happy because for one of the first time in a long time I obeyed Gods voice immediately.
P.S Visit this blog with an open mind. I know people have different opinions but be respectful.

Not All information is Good information!

Not all information is good information. Yesterday I stumbled across a website that talked about lots and lots of the evil that was going on in this world. I didn't read a lot of it but I read enough for it to disturb my mind, the thing with my mind is that its quite sensitive. I learn and take in information by reading, its not that I'm some kind of genius that remembers everything that she reads but certain parts jump out at me and replay in my mind. So i read this and i tell you guys that most of the stuff i read kept replaying in my mind and i could not sleep. Because the information i read was negative it put me in an anxious/nervous state. So what did i do next??
I prayed.. lol i prayed for peace of mind. Seriously though this is not that first time this has happened, its like i don't learn my lesson but this time i think God allowed me to be a bit more disturbed for longer to teach me a lesson. I had to call my pastor and be like i read this that and this PLEASE, pray for peace of mind for me.

sighs funnily enough total peace of mind came upon me this afternoon. I know people may say negative things like "you have a weak mind, that's why it affected you the way it did". But that's not the point. I learnt from that and previous experiences that not all information is good for you at all.Some you should just stay away from! especially if you are susceptible. This entry is for my future reference in case I EVER feel like reading something stupid again, which will be NEVER!

I end with this

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." John 14:27

Excel in the face of Adversity

Recently I saw something that made me very sad and I don't think that will change, i think every time i encounter it i will react the same way. taken aback..reclusive...and lonely.  I should know  and i have heard that some people in the world are like that and its their choice, but it doesn't make it hurt any less. So i write to let it out! It so sad when you like people so much but they end up hurting you because of prejudgements and unfair sweeping conclusions about you that have no ground . Especially when its something you can't control, some thing they have no right to look down on you because of .... In deep thought i came to this conclusion.

People's opinions should not and will not in the future concern me, I will not change who I am because of people who are inconsiderate. My attitude will not change, no matter who you are or where you are from I will give you a fair chance. Those who have been hurt should not hurt others.
Confident Lifestyle! Their opinion of me does not change the truth of who i really am inside, when let them change my attitude is when I have been defeated.

Fight Against Sugar!

Sugar..ahhh sugar the white gold dust, companies make billions all around the world because of people like me. Sad very sad because these refined sugars are not good for me!! argh okay  its that time again I will once again try to curb my sugar cravings flat out for 2 weeks. That means-no cake
- no biscuits
- no white flour
- No Refined sugar.
This is easier said than done especially when you have been on the stuff for so long. I feel really tired and have a lack of energy and I Know that this is definitely one of the reasons!
I also have my exams in 2 days. I
am nervous not finished covering all the handouts. Better get to work !

Comparison is the thief of Joy

I decided to start doing pilates some time ago, so i you tubed some videos and found a really good instructor called Cassie Ho. She's so encouraging!! i tried one of videos today and she said something really hit home " Comparison is the thief of joy". This is so true I've found when i compare myself to others it tends to be the saddest of times. You shouldn't compare and every one should go at their own pace, God made us unique and for a certain purpose and  i shouldn't forget that
.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GcprcpeOdG0 - Thats a link to her pilates video if you are intrested!

Craving for Black Bean noodles aka

Recently some friends took me to a Korean Restaurant ( my friends are not Korean) because we wanted to try something new. The menu was really confusing because i didn't understand it but the waitress was helpful and i randomly pointed at a picture that said Jajaangmun... hopefully that's the right spelling. It ended up being Black bean noodles. O MY GOSH that stuff is the bomb. i ate this i think a week ago and since then I've been having a craving for it.. but its an expensive craving £8.00 is ALOT, i wish they did student discount. Meh, the point is i think i have to learn to make this dish myself. i will post a picture of my sucess or failure :D

Perseverance

I'm on my way back from work, contemplating if i should head straight to the library or Sleep. On my way to work at 5.30am I saw people in there.. like studying, I was not surprised but it was impressive to see. Now on my journey back the same Asian guy I saw earlier studying by the window !! that's what i call perseverance,  and I need some of that in my life. In recent post talked about how  stressed i am because  of upcoming  exams, well to be honest it's completely my fault. when I had the chance and time to study i didn't. There were some issues going on at the time but i don't think it was an excuse. I let myself be engulfed by laziness and sloth when i could have easily prayed and asked for help. Sighs.. If I let you know the many times i have done this, My late revision history you would be shocked. But at every time God has been merciful and allowed me to do well, like really well. I am currently in my first year of university and these are my first set of exams. As you read my posts you will find out that i am far from perfect and there's many things about me that you would think... why? But I have no issue God is strong in my weakness and as long as I have the faith that he is there I know that in time I will Change. Ack my eyes are soo heavy!!

Work

My shift starts at 5.30am this morning, i seriously need to get to sleep. How do i feel about work?? well its really early but I get away with ALOT. like really I am not bragging but my employers are seriously nice people also i also think that God is covering for me ALOT. I mean some days I just don't show up either because i woke up late or just being really irresponsible. I should be soo fired, but I can't lie I think I love this Job. There's a real love for it in my heart, like i genuinely want to do a good job for them and not be lazy but it probably seems to them that i am taking them from granted. I've decided that from now I will definitely try to make it on the days I am on.....

Awake At This Time (Exams)

I have a lot on my mind this early morning, finishing my morning prayer is one of them, the other is my upcoming exams. I mean come on why do i always leave it late, its a new year 2014 wow! But with this year better come actual Change. I don't know why exactly I have decided to write a blog but i really feel its Therapeutic in some way. LOL blogs are a cheap therapy session.On a serious note i hope people will read and grow from my experiences some how. I plan to be very honest and also include funny stories from the Past :D probably once a month hehe.